How can the person who means the world to you be standing right in front of you and not have the slightest clue about how much they mean to you. I think that’s the hardest part, wanting to show and tell someone how much you love them but knowing you can’t because those words are not yours to say.
When I did, it felt like a bucket of cold water was splashed at me and I just stood there- stunned- stuck in my head and trying to figure out how to react.
I don’t know whether to cry at the stinging reality of that discovery or to laugh at the piteousness of the situation that I allow myself to be in. It was a bit funny really. I slowly shook my head, sighed, smirked, and for a moment preached to myself: “You knew this could happen.”
There was disappointment, yes, but there’s also relenting. It’s like yielding to the inevitable after some period of hoping for a happy ending.
hearthead (via thoughttraffic)
